The metamorphosis that is life

This last week or so I have really been looking back over the choices that I have made throughout my life, the factors that contributed to those choices as well as the things that I enjoy and choose to do with my time; Throughout the 2005-2010 period my choices were always pretty much the same and driven by the same theme. I really hated everything about myself and instead of trying to understand that and work through the reasons and causes which seemed like an impossible undertaking at the time I instead ran from that and pretty much everything I did was a form of escapism in trying not to deal with things.

Thankfully that period of my life ended and I have gone through a lot of changes these last 4 years which was kind of driven home in the parting of the ways speech by Matt Smith in The Time of the Doctor. A lot of religions and spiritual teachings have a concept of reincarnation, the journey of the soul, lessons and growth however it also holds true in each individual lifetime as well. There are lessons to be learnt and if we are always exactly the same we become stagnant.

“It all just disappears doesn’t it? Everything you are, gone in a moment like breath on a mirror.
Any moment now, heโ€™s a coming, The Doctor and I always will be. But times change and so must I. We all change, when you think about it.
We are all different people all through our lives and that’s okay, that’s good you’ve got to keep moving so long as you remember all the people that you used to be.
I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear. I will always remember when The Doctor was me…” ~ Matt Smith

As we move through our lives it is important to remember the things that have gotten us to where we are today; There will always be things that we do not like but instead of being bogged down by them simply make a change. The last few years have certainly been filled with change for me mostly internally with my interests and likes; I recognize my previous escapist based behavior and I try to take steps to not allow it to resurface within myself which has led to a change in interests. Where I could throw all my time at video games in the past and become lost / enjoy the stories and content of them these days I have virtually no interest and whilst I do still game occasionally as it is good to have a mundane and relatively mindless distraction I don’t let it get anywhere near the levels that they used to with almost all my time outside of work spent playing something.

A lot of my interests and hobbies and things that I like have been re-aligning with how I used to be when I was younger, more myself and considerably more happy which is a good thing however like everything else in life there is also some changes. Creativity and expression seem to be taking a greater forefront in my interests of late aside from writing more I feel like trying to draw things which I attempted once a long time ago and was never very good at it which makes the push somewhat interesting to me and although I have been putting off attempting to draw anything I at least have my photography to express and paint a picture and think I might give digital manipulation / art a go first.

But to work with this interest I have found myself looking more and more at the artwork of others and have even been purchasing pieces of late which I plan to frame and put up on my walls to go with my collection of blades and dragons. This for me accomplishes a couple of things, it satisfies my desire for art, supports the creativity of others who are incredibly skilled and deserve recognition and helps them make a living with their art and I get to look at and discover some really cool stuff.

But as times and we ourselves change it is important to remember the things, people, events, beliefs that have shaped our past and helped make us who we are today and guide us in the decisions we make for who we wish to be in the future. Like glass on a mirror our lives in this world are fleeting and it is up to each of us to make the most of them, and in mine as much as some things are changed being there for others, questioning and continuing to learn things will always be a core part of who I am.

Will share the artwork I have been purchasing when the rest of it arrives and I have it all framed up. Where once I would look at art and perhaps go yeah that is cool I find I have tastes now and they seem quite varied ๐Ÿ™‚

Have a great day everybody.

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